February 2012
2 posts
3 tags
“Everyone ready for National Deja Vu Day on the 20th & 21st?”
4 tags
“Buy food and help save animals. Buy our PETA breads.”
January 2012
2 posts
7 tags
“I once got lice everyone could see. They were public lice.”
7 tags
December 2011
3 posts
5 tags
“I sprayed anti-persperant deodorant on my kettle to stop the steam coming out of...”
8 tags
“I once got head lice in my pubic hair. I think they were lost.”
7 tags
“I bought a hole punch but then couldn’t find any holes to file.”
September 2011
4 posts
4 tags
“I bought a set of tumblers but they were rubbish. They broke when I rolled them...”
6 tags
“I got contact lenses then my eyesight got worse so now I wear glasses as well.”
4 tags
“Thank fuck(ing) for evolution.”
5 tags
“I figured out how to make a Smurf apart from the tips of the fingers. I need the...”
August 2011
4 posts
5 tags
“We live in an ever shrinking world. I blame expanding foam.”
6 tags
“My friend’s an agoraphobic astronomer. He looks at the stars through the...”
5 tags
“When I think about how powerful tornadoes are it blows my mind.”
5 tags
“Why did it take so long for DIY stores to get self service checkouts?”
June 2011
1 post
5 tags
“The future’s bright. The future’s our sun expanding before becoming...”
May 2011
4 posts
3 tags
“So I guess when people say “Can I ask you a question?” they really...”
6 tags
“I think I’m allergic to bees. Whenever I’m near them I break out in...”
4 tags
“I’m fighting against aquarian prostitutes. Stop those blow fish.”
April 2011
3 posts
3 tags
“Genius is… 50% vowels, 50% consonants.”
4 tags
“My computer has a virus. It says to press the AltMed key.”
4 tags
“Gold Boolean. It’s either gold or it’s not.”
March 2011
11 posts
5 tags
“My penis is shy and solves crime. He’s a private dick.”
4 tags
“My computer wants a different snarl and has told me to press the AltGrrr key.”
4 tags
“I’ve just had an encyclopaedia tell me “to leave or else”....”
4 tags
“I’ve just painted my front door with bright pink and green paint....”
2 tags
“Wesley Snipes. John Hurt.”
5 tags
“I cry with my little eye something beginning with a punch.”
4 tags
“Belief in God. It’s easy when you know Howe.”
5 tags
“I try having engaging discussions with my dog but they never work out....”
5 tags
“This crunchy honey is the bees knees.”
4 tags
“I tried becoming a navel officer but I just couldn’t stomach it.”
5 tags
“The Fulcrum Society has had to close due to pressure from the Government. We...”
February 2011
2 posts
4 tags
“The Papier-mâché Society has had to fold due to outside pressures.”
4 tags
“Just been bamboozled by a man only 12 microns tall. I just couldn’t get a...”
January 2011
2 posts
6 tags
“My American dwarf friend lives in a condominimum.”
“I’m not making any money from my removals business so I guess I’ll...”
December 2010
8 posts
4 tags
“That’s a shame. That new origami merchandise shop has folded.”
5 tags
“Wishing all naturists a Happy Nude Year!”
4 tags
“Just finished decorating the tree. Looks much better in matt white.”
5 tags
“Just bought a pair of flatfish on wheels. They’re roller skates.”
4 tags
“Start my new job on Monday as a lice and mite specialist. I’m itching to...”
“I cum so quickly I think I’ve got precognitive ejaculation.”
5 tags
“There’s been a lot of murders in my fish tank. I suspect it’s the...”
4 tags
“My sister is made of entirely of cake. She’s my parents favourite....”
November 2010
1 post
4 tags
“Quantum women - can’t live with them, can’t live without them. All...”
October 2010
12 posts
4 tags
“Tartar: Goodbye teeth.”
4 tags
“Enamel: Electronic namel.”
5 tags
“Gum pockets: Where your teeth keep their stuff.”